I'll Miss You, Charlie... You Were the Best Dog EVER.

My heart is heavy with sadness. Today I lost my best friend. Sure, he shed enough fur in one day to knit a sweater out of and he occasionally got into the kids' food when they'd turn their backs, but otherwise, Charlie was a really GOOD dog. The best I've ever had. And I am deeply sorrowed that I only got to spend a short time with him.

I have a weakness for all things puppy/dog/canine/furry. So, when I came across an ad on KSL for a pug mix that needed to be adopted last summer, I felt compelled to answer the ad. In less than an hour, I had both kids loaded in the car and was on my way to meet Charlie.

The Grantsville Animal shelter is a pretty awful place for dogs. It's in the middle of nowhere, even for Grantsville, and the fact that a dog as decent as Charlie came from that place is nothing short of a miracle. The minute I saw him, I was in love. I let him greet Brayden and Sarah and he was so happy and pleasant I instantly knew I had to bring him home. I felt so happy to have saved this animal from an inevitable euthanasia.

Brian's not a big fan of my puppy obsession, especially after a failed attempt with a dog who had some aggression issues. But after some time, even he started to like Charlie. The kids loved Charlie and played with him all the time. They really liked taking him out in the yard and throwing his ropes and balls to him. I loved having him around and laughing at all of his quirks.
Charlie was such a sweetheart. He loved to love people. He just wanted to be near me, all the time. He was always so happy, he never got upset or frustrated with the kids, no matter how difficult they can be. He was always well-behaved. Even my dad, the biggest anti-dog person I've ever known, had grown attached to Charlie. Charlie came with us camping, on car rides, and he LOVED going to Petco. He had the typical rosebud pug ears, but when he was happy his ears would perk right up and you just knew he was full of joy.

Last night, I didn't think much of it when Charlie started throwing up. I had been cleaning the fridge out and accidentally spilled some spoiled food all over the floor and before I could stop him, he ate a few small pieces. I'm not sure if that's what caused this, but I think it may have, and I instantly figured that was why, and didn't really worry too much. I can't think what else he ate that might've caused it. I let Charlie outside while I cleaned the mess, but when I asked Brayden to let him back in, Charlie didn't come running up to the door like he usually does. He was just laying outside in the dirt and wouldn't come when I called. I finally picked him up and brought him back inside and cleaned the mud off of him. He was extremely lethargic, and threw up a little more, but I assumed he just didn't feel good. I brought him upstairs with me when I went to bed, and he seemed to be feeling a little better, so I fell asleep. Brian woke me at midnight because Charlie had an "accident" where he was laying at the foot of the bed, and I got up and threw the blanket in the wash and moved Charlie to the floor by my side of the bed, onto a towel in case he had more problems. I patted him on the head and rubbed his ears and then went back to sleep.

My alarm went off at 4am to wake me up for work. I turned it off and then called to Charlie to see if he needed to go out. He didn't respond, so I turned on the bedside lamp. He was still laying on the floor by the bed. I called his name again, but again, nothing. I bent down to pet him and to my horror, he was cold and stiff. Charlie, my best dog ever, had passed away. I was heartbroken and grabbed Brian to confirm my awful, horrible discovery. He was definitely dead. I cried and cried. I couldn't even help Brian take him outside. Knowing I had to be at work today, I plowed through the usual morning routine to get ready and left for work.

Work was HARD. It was hard to walk by the pet supply aisle, hard to see the service dog a lady brought into the store, hard to even spend a minute or two without distraction, since my thoughts inevitably went straight back to Charlie. Coming home from work was bad, too. The familiar jingle of his dog tags was replaced with cold silence. I didn't have his greeting when I walked in the door. I was even sad I didn't have any messes to clean up. The house feels so empty now. I tried turning on the TV, but instead of being able to watch Animal Planet, I ended up in tears again, so I turned it off. Even now, as I sit here alone, I just feel so empty, and oh, so very, very lonely.

I will miss you Charlie. You were such a good boy, in fact, you were the best dog I've ever had, and I hope you know I loved you very much. I hope you had a happy, full life with us and I hope you're in a better place now. Say hi to my mom for me, and give her a big sloppy dog kiss. I'll miss you buddy...